sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
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