hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
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