Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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