My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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