Sry I called you an 8
Are we in a gay sports bar?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
