How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
