oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
