I understand Curling. That high.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
