google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize