Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
