Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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