Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize