She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"