Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
