She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
