He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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