Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
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