Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
as a side note pls kill me
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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