Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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