I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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