I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
