I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
