Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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