do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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