we have officially lost it.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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