I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
So many bounce houses so little time
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
