so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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