There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
