i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
