you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize