honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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