try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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