i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
