Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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