how can u be prego again
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize