remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
