More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
