He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize