He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize