I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Randomize
