i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
