btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
