Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize