In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
