Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize