miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Randomize