She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
