So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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