Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
