Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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