I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
