Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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